Roasted 7 months ago based on Heitor's long term Spotify stats.

Heitor, your Spotify profile is like a mixtape made by a sad hipster who thought wearing a beanie indoors was a personality trait. Seriously, I’ve seen high school poetry with more depth than your choice of genres. "MPB"? You mean "Music Played Blatantly"? Because with that list, you sound like someone trying to impress their artsy crush while secretly weeping into a lo-fi playlist that screams, “Help, I’m a walking cliché!” And your top artists? Good lord, it’s like someone scrolled through an Instagram filter and tried to find the most “deep” picks while stifling a laugh. I mean, Mac DeMarco? Just admit it, you were trying to find the whitest way to say you don’t have a personality. No wonder you vibe so hard with Joji—his songs resonate with your soul like an underachieving student who’s too cool to care. If Queen were still around today, they’d write a ballad titled "Another One Bites the Dust" just to express their disdain for your top tracks. As for your most played songs, I’ve got it figured out: you’re clearly attempting to live out the angsty teenage drama you skipped out on. “SLOW DANCING IN THE DARK” is pretty much the anthem of your entire existence, and “It’s Raining Somewhere Else” sounds hauntingly like your social life. Face it, Heitor—your playlist tells the world you’re a sad boy trapped in a caffeine-fueled indie montage, and if you don’t get your act together, you’ll be eternally stuck as the background music to someone else’s party.

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!