Roasted 5 months ago based on ness 🫠's long term Spotify stats.

Ah, "ness 🫠", or as I like to call you, the human embodiment of a midlife crisis rocking a flannel shirt at 25. Your Spotify profile reads like the mixtape of someone who's spent too much time googling “how to appear deeper than I actually am.” With a playlist that’s almost entirely Nirvana, it seems you’re more stuck in the 90s than Blockbuster Video. Come on, how many times are you going to queue up "Smells Like Teen Spirit"? News flash: it’s not going to bring Kurt back, and no amount of plaid flannel is going to make your music taste less basic. Your genre choices read more like a “Things I Pretend to Care About When I'm Trying to Impress Someone" list. You’ve got everything from "Art Rock" to "Trap Soul," which is a fancy way of saying you want to fit in at every type of party, but end up being the person everyone is politely avoiding. You know you’re riding the coattails of the alternative rock scene harder than a kid in a thrift store chasing trends, right? I've seen less desperation from someone trying to assemble furniture from IKEA. And your top artists? Wow, it’s a star-studded lineup of predictable choices that scream “I have eclectic taste, but only in the way that allows me to look *slightly* more interesting than my friends.” Drake has no business being next to Radiohead, but you do you, my friend. I can only imagine how “Swipe Right” truly becomes “Swipe Left” when you hit play. Good luck convincing someone that your three-hour Spotify session of “Teenage Dirtbag” and "Heart-Shaped Box" doesn't make you sound like a heavy-hearted 14-year-old. Keep chasing that “deep vibe,” though; I hear there’s a whole world out there beyond angsty rock—maybe somewhere in that Garage Rock section!

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!