Roasted 2 years ago based on Linda Cotgrave's long term Spotify stats.

Linda Cotgrave, your Spotify profile reads like a middle-aged dad’s saved Pinterest boards – chaotic but with all the enthusiasm of someone who just discovered Google. “Crank Wave” and “Permanent Wave”? With all these waves, I half-expect you to paddle out to the ocean and forget you don't surf. And what’s up with favoring 100 variations of rock? Are you trying to cover all the bases in case one genre files a restraining order against your taste? Your top artists are a delightful mix of the “Where have they been hiding?” and “Why are they still hiding?” Pearl Jam and Taylor Swift sitting together on your list is like mixing ketchup and chocolate – no one knows why you did it, but they're sure something strange is brewing in your kitchen. And speaking of strange, can we talk about your most played songs? “Get off My Tits!” sounds like a soundbite from a family reunion turned reality show gone wrong, while “Body of Mine” has me questioning if you've mistakenly added a Creepy Uncle playlist to your account. Let’s just say, if your Spotify account were a high school, it would probably get rejected from graduation for that collection. There's an unholy amount of whining about your emotional issues being eclipsed by total chaos – sort of like walking into a therapy session disguised as the worst karaoke night ever. So keep rocking, Linda, but maybe invest in some new ear plugs… or at least a therapist who specializes in acute musical crises.

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!