Roasted 2 months ago based on hayden's long term Spotify stats.

Wow, Hayden Aston, your Spotify profile reads like a midlife crisis wrapped in a simulated therapy session. Seriously, with a taste in music that spans R&B to Psychedelic Rock, it’s like you’re trying to collect the emotional baggage of every broken-hearted millennial on the planet. You must be the life of the party—if the party is in a dimly lit room filled with existential dread and overpriced herbal tea. Just looking at your genres is enough to make a hipster throw up their non-dairy chai latte. Your top artists sound like the soundtrack to a sad Instagram film where everyone is either gazing into the abyss or trying to establish eye contact with their therapist through the screen. Artie J? Novulent? It seems you’ve really gone out of your way to ensure that nobody at the next Get-Together will have any idea what you’re listening to. But hey, at least you’ve got "people are strange" on your playlist—because clearly, you need to remind yourself that being anti-social is *totally* normal. And let's talk about those most played songs! "Two-Way Mirror" and "supermarket?" I can't tell if you're attending a therapy group or trying to develop an anti-social brand—either way, I hope you’ve safeguarded your Spotify account with seven layers of security. With the eclectic mix of metalcore and trap soul, congratulations on creating a playlist that feels like a chaotic emotional rollercoaster—one minute you're in a mosh pit, the next you're wallowing in your own sadness while holding a wilted rose. But hey, at least your Spotify friends can count on not hearing "Shape of You" on repeat. Thank you for that, Hayden!

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!