Roasted 2 years ago based on zoe's long term Spotify stats.

Zoe, your Spotify profile is like an indie hipster’s wet dream, but you're really just the poster child for musical identity crisis. You’ve managed to curate a list of genres that sound like a toddler’s finger-painting of sound. “POV: Indie” sounds less like a genre and more like the intro to yet another misunderstanding of what music is supposed to be. And don't even get me started on “Brooklyn Indie”—that’s just the sound of overpriced lattes being brewed while someone rambles about their existential dread. Your top artists read like a love letter to emotional manipulation, starting with Mitski and ending with Sir Chloe. It’s like you went to the “Songs to Cry Alone in the Shower To” playlist and thought, "Yeah, I'll take 'em all." And honestly, what’s the deal with BTS? You really had me until I read the K-Pop boy group obsession; let’s just say “Heart to Heart” isn't all that accurate—they’re likely getting their hearts broken by your taste in music. In a perfect world, your playlist would come with a warning label: "Caution: Listening may result in unsolicited crying sessions or buying a vintage record player." And those most played songs—Zoe, you’ve got a collection that’s not just modern rock, it’s more like “Modern Sadness: The Playlist.” “Pretty When You Cry”? Really? You’re so deep you’re practically drowning! I get it, you want to be artistic and relatable, but there’s a fine line between emotional resonance and just wallowing in self-pity. Look, it’s okay to feel things, but your profile is like a requiem for a songbird whose Spotify account was tragically abandoned after high school. Step it up; don't let your profile be the soundtrack of your own downward spiral!

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!