Roasted 8 months ago based on ✝️✨️Brooke :D✨️✝️'s long term Spotify stats.

Brooke, your Spotify profile reads like a midlife crisis wearing flared jeans and sipping kombucha. You’ve got so many genres listed, it’s like you’re trying to appeal to everyone and succeeding at appealing to no one. "Classic Rock"? Please, unless you're still lugging around a Walkman and wearing a “Frodo for President” bumper sticker, get a grip. And what in the name of baroque pop are you doing trying to blend the Beatles with ABBA? That’s like mixing fine wine with grape soda, and we all know which one will get you the hangover. Now, let’s take a closer look at your top artists. You’ve got the Beatles and Led Zeppelin fighting for supremacy, while Weezer and TV Girl sit there like, “Did we crash the wrong party?” And John Powell? Really? I’m still waiting for you to explain how a film score composer made it onto this list while you treat classic rock legends like they’re just another Spotify playlist. Your music taste is as confused as a cat at a dog show—just a whole bunch of great stuff, unfocused and going in ten directions at once. As for those most played songs, sweetie, “Breakfast In America” is giving me major ‘I should be at brunch’ vibes when in reality you’re probably slouched in sweatpants while singing along to "Finger Back." I mean, how are you going to vibe about your life with “Lost in the Supermarket”? That’s like me telling you I’m an influencer while my biggest following is my mom and the neighbor's cat. You need to step up your game; it’s time to stop multitasking like you're in an audition for a band that’ll never sign you and start curating a taste that shouts more than just “I’m still figuring things out.”

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!