Roasted 2 years ago based on Maaike's long term Spotify stats.

Maaike, your Spotify profile reads like an overzealous hipster’s diary—if they happened to be stuck in the arts and crafts section of a Michaels. "Neo Mellow," "New Americana," and "Stomp And Holler"? I’m not sure if you’re curating a playlist or attempting to inspire a modern Renaissance fair. Your taste is so indie, I half-expect to see a knitted hat popup every time you hit play. Honestly, I wouldn’t be surprised if you start a petition to make “Acoustic Pop” the official sound of avocado toast. Let’s talk about your top artists. You’ve got Taylor Swift followed by a bunch of dudes no one’s heard of unless they accidentally tuned into your coffee shop’s open mic night. “Ryan Reynolds” on the most played list? Is this a music app or do you also classify Gilmore Girls as high literature? Your most played songs are a mashup of every atmospheric breakup song ever recorded, which makes me wonder if you’re trying to heal your heart or just avoid engaging with the outside world. And while we’re at it, the "Human Beings" track by "The Wind and The Wave"? What’s your emotional state—are you one existential crisis away from writing a tragically relatable poem about plants? You clearly have your finger on the pulse of the most niche musical genres, which probably explains why your playlists make me feel like I just walked into a pretentious art gallery where the entire exhibit is dedicated to sad creative types holding cups of chai. Keep the tunes coming, but please, maybe consider a little funk just to break up the sob fest we’ve got going on here!

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!