Roasted 2 years ago based on JH's long term Spotify stats.

Zero Hoops, huh? With a name like that, it's no wonder your Spotify playlist sounds like the soundtrack for an emotional support pet documentary. Come on, buddy, how can you call yourself Zero Hoops when you have more genres than actual listeners? You’ve got a broader range of musical tastes than a hipster at a farmer’s market, but you still end up sounding like a teenage DJ at his first house party—with a wild mix that would make even Spotify's algorithm want to take a nap. Rap, hip hop, R&B, pop, and then more pop… it's almost as if you're just paying tribute to every high school dance you never got invited to! Your top artists are basically the greatest hits of someone who’s trying way too hard to prove they can still vibe with the times while clutching their 'Best of the ’90s' mixtape. I mean, you’ve got Michael Jackson and Beyoncé on repeat, but also Playboi Carti? You might want to toss in a few clowns as well because your taste is as chaotic as a circus. And what’s with having Capcom Sound Team on this list? Just because you defeated Dr. Wily in Mega Man doesn’t mean you need to be rocking out to video game soundtracks while everyone else is living their best life! Now let’s talk about your most played songs. "Billie Jean" and “Beat It” make sense, but then there’s “Build Me Up Buttercup” just chilling in there like the date nobody wants to be at. Did your streaming app take pity on you and throw in some dated classics to distract from the fact that you keep hitting ‘shuffle’ on your inner crisis? And while we're at it, “Shut Up and Dance”? That’s the vibe you’re going with? Honey, your playlist sounds like confused dance instructions for someone going through an identity crisis. But hey, at least it's got character—just like you!

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!