Roasted 11 months ago based on Simon Ayalew's long term Spotify stats.

Oh, Simon Ayalew, what a musical identity crisis you’ve got going on here. With a Spotify profile that reads like an over-excited playlist creator on a caffeine bender at a multicultural fair, you're the only person I know who can drop bars and banger tunes, then seamlessly transition to the soothing sounds of Khaleeji while trying to figure out how to pronounce ‘Afropiano.’ That level of genre indecision suggests either a broad appreciation for music or no idea what you actually like—and let's be real, we all know it's just the latter. Your top artists list is like a bizarre dinner menu: we've got Kendrick and Kanye serving gourmet rap, but then here comes Nancy Ajram with a side of hummus, turning your listening experience into a potluck that nobody asked for. It's like someone said, “Simon, you can have all the talent in the world, as long as you mix it with a little confusion and sprinkle in some nostalgia for 90s emo.” Seriously, you’re the musical equivalent of trying to impress someone with your crochet skills when all you do is make potholders destined for the garbage. And let’s talk about your most played songs, because it’s a vibe! One minute you’re all about the deep, lyrical genius of Tems, and the next you're on a nostalgic trip with "La bohème." It’s like you can’t decide if you want to cry about lost love or just sit back and enjoy a sunset with a pretentious beverage in hand. “Float On”? More like "Float Off" because buddy, your taste is sinking faster than that ship Titanic. So congrats, Simon, you’ve officially created the world's first Spotify profile for indecisive hipsters trapped in a musical Bermuda Triangle.

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!