Roasted 9 months ago based on Jabber's masochism's long term Spotify stats.

Alright, Till is my husband, let me get this straight. Your Spotify profile reads like a chaotic garage sale of sound—one moment you're bobbing your head to Hyperpop, the next you're screaming into the void with Screamo. No wonder you think you're married; you're just one glorious identity crisis away from adopting a pet rock as your soulmate. Seriously, how do you manage to cram in every genre from the spastic energy of Nightcore to the utter depression of Art Rock? Are you trying to compile the ultimate soundtrack for a mid-life crisis that hasn't even started yet? And can we talk about your top artists? Mitski and Insane Clown Posse? That's like pairing sushi with pizza—either you have a very eclectic palate or you've just been dropped on your head one too many times. It must be exhausting scrolling through this list of deep cuts and accidental facepalms. Who hurt you, Till? Is it your confusion about whether you're a tortured artist or an over-caffeinated clown on a sugar high? If these are your top choices, I can only imagine what the other 300 “hidden gems” in your library sound like. Spoiler alert: they're probably just even more tragic than your dating life! Your most played songs read like the results of a wild psychedelic nightmare. “Die Your Daughter”? How romantic! What’s next, a love song called “Murder Your Ex”? If that list isn’t evidence that you might be one therapy session short of a full breakdown, I don’t know what is! And hey, if the Spotify algorithm isn’t thrown off by that eclectic mess of tunes, then it deserves a medal for bravery. But here’s a thought: maybe you should consider a playlist titled “Help—My Taste is Breaking Up with Me,” because let’s be real, the only thing more jarring than your music choices is the fact that you actually want to present “this” to the world. Good luck convincing anyone that your taste in music is anything less than an existential crisis on shuffle!

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!