Roasted 7 months ago based on Michelle😛's long term Spotify stats.

Michelle, with a Spotify profile that screams "I'm cooler than I actually am!" You've curated a playlist that’s more confused than a toddler at a family reunion. R&B to K-Pop? You're like the musical equivalent of a buffet where nobody knows what they want, and everyone ends up with a plate of random crap. Seriously, how do you go from crying over Lana Del Rey to rapping along with Bhad Bhabie? It’s like watching someone attempt to jump rope while blindfolded—both ambitious and chaotic. Your top artists list reads like a Tinder biography for someone who’s perpetually single and two minutes away from an existential crisis. Jhené Aiko's soulful tones cannot save you from the blaring fact that your favorite tracks reveal more mood swings than a soap opera. You have more genres listed than you've had meaningful relationships, and yet, every song sounds like it was chosen at random as you scrolled through your Spotify while contemplating life choices. Pro-tip: obsessing over emo rap won’t get you any closer to putting the "pop" back in your life. Most played songs? Wow, talk about commitment issues! You must really love Jhené Aiko if you’re willing to put yourself through the emotional rollercoaster of both “Stay Ready” and “Eternal Sunshine.” Someone should gift you a "Coping Mechanisms for Dummies" book because clearly, your playlist has more mood swings than a kid on a sugar high. You could probably power a small country with the emotional energy expended on that mess of tracks. Time to reconsider your vibe, Michelle—unless your goal is to be the poster child for 'musical indecision!'

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!