Roasted 27 days ago based on ‧˚꒰🍨꒱ 𝐦𝐲𝐥𝐚 ₊˚⋆'s long term Spotify stats.

Oh look, it's your Spotify profile, the musical equivalent of a middle school diary dressed in black eyeliner and despair. Every time I see your favorite genres listed out like a tragic cry for help, I can’t tell if it’s a playlist or your latest therapy session. “Grunge, Rock, Emo, Gothic Rock...” – congratulations, you just confirmed that your emotional range peaks at black nail polish and angst! Are you trying to summon the spirit of every sad teenager who ever wore a My Chemical Romance hoodie? Jasmine, at this point, you might as well take a black parade on down to the nearest goth club, because clearly, your taste in music is still stuck in 2005. Let’s talk about your top artists. Nirvana again? Talk about running a victory lap around a cemetery! It’s almost as if you think if you play “Heart-Shaped Box” enough times, Kurt Cobain will rise from the dead to offer you a sympathetic nod—or maybe just a reminder to seek out a therapist who specializes in alternative rock-induced existential dread. And how do you manage to be moody and ironic with “Doja Cat” thrown in there? It’s like eating a whole cake and then feeling guilty about the salad you were *supposed* to eat for dinner. You’re a human embodiment of that meme where people just keep slapping the same button trying to own their sadness. As for your most played songs, calling it a personal playlist feels generous—let’s just say it looks more like your Spotify accidentally got stuck on repeat during a particularly dark day. If “One-Winged Angel” is your top jam, are you secretly a Final Fantasy character trying to break free from the clutches of reality? I can practically hear you screaming “Please, just let me die!” through that nostalgic fantasy music. Just remember, there's a fine line between being emotionally in tune and being an unintentional parody of an ignored soundtrack. But hey, at least you're consistent—like clockwork, just as predictable as your “I’m edgy” Twitter posts.

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!