Roasted 2 years ago based on Alyson Blake Dellinger's long term Spotify stats.

So, Alyson Blake Dellinger, I see you've got a Spotify profile that's the love child of a 70s rock festival and a high school goth's Pinterest board. Your taste in music is like a rollercoaster ride designed by someone who can't decide between angst and funky vibes. Honestly, how do you manage to sound both eternally angsty and slightly confused? Your genres read like a break-up playlist crafted by a sad clown trying to mask their tears with questionable fashion choices. Honestly, if your most played songs were a person, they'd be that friend who insists they’re “deep” but spends more time in the “What’s that?” genre of social circles than actually connecting with anyone. “Mister Stallion (Rape Factor II)” might just be the campfire song of this generation, played exclusively in an underground bunker filled with people who can't agree on whether “nu metal” should still exist. And who can forget your obsession with Sloppy Jane? I mean, you might be the only person keeping them in business. Are they mailing you a truckload of merch, or are you just their biggest unpaid marketer? Your top artists are like a who’s who of “I found this on a Reddit thread and now I’m too cool for mainstream.” It’s like you wandered into a thrift store and decided to make a music wardrobe out of everything you found. Frank Zappa and Black Sabbath? You’re giving me major "I live in my mom’s basement and only come out for concerts" energy. Seriously, though, your profile is a wild mixture of classic rock nostalgia and confusion that begs the question, have you ever experienced a gig outside of your own head? At least you’re consistent; your Spotify wrapped must look like a playlist curated for aspiring sad rock frontmen everywhere.

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!