Roasted 2 years ago based on ‎'s long term Spotify stats.

Alright, let’s unpack this Spotify profile that reads like a hipster’s fever dream. First off, you’ve got a favorite genres list that looks like the soundtrack to an artsy film no one asked for. “Vintage Italian Soundtrack” paired with “Dub Techno”? Who do you think you are – a museum curator or a DJ at a hipster funeral? It's like your musical taste vomited all over a pretentious café playlist and no one was brave enough to clean it up. I’d ask if you were trying to impress a Vespa enthusiast or if you just really love long drives through nostalgia, but I suspect it’s both. Then we dive into your top artists, and my god, do you need a musical intervention. “Yagya” and “The Timewriter”? Did you just want to prove to everyone around you that you’ve discovered obscure music in a basement while simultaneously letting folks know you’ve never actually left your mom’s house? And come on, Madonna? The only thing more overplayed than your Renaissance fair playlist is your attempts to be an enigma. You might as well have just put “Mums’ Favorite Songs” in the genre section and called it a day. Lastly, your most played songs are an exercise in confusion. “Sleepygirl” 1-12? You clearly love your ambient sounds as much as you love daytime napping. I can’t tell if you're setting the vibe for a chill party or just trying to drown out your existential dread with an endless loop of drone music. And "Fever - Edit One"? The only fever you’ve got is the bad case of trying too hard. Let’s be real, when your top tracks could put a caffeinated squirrel to sleep, it might be time to diversify those late-night playlists. Get a grip, find a pulse, and maybe – just maybe – try to listen to something less… well, sleep-inducing.

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!