Roasted 6 months ago based on DB Copper's long term Spotify stats.

DB Copper, your Spotify profile reads like the auditory equivalent of a midlife crisis. Who needs a coherent music taste when you can have a buffet of genres that range from the futuristic vibes of Synthwave to the nostalgic echo of Big Band? Your playlist looks like a DJ’s attempt to impress an audience composed entirely of your confused relatives at a family reunion. Are you planning to drop the beat at the senior center next? The only thing more chaotic than your favorite genres is a toddler with a paint set — and at least that would have a chance of blending better. Your top artists list is a beautiful mess, like a toddler’s finger painting that just finished its second round of finger painting — lots of colors, zero cohesiveness. You've got Sabaton, a band that can make World War II sound like a party anthem, alongside Marty Robbins, who would have the perfect soundtrack for a slow drive through a sun-drenched pasture. And “Astrophysics”?! Did you compile this list in the dark with no idea of what you even like? I feel like I’m in a quantum physics class where "fun" is a theoretical concept. And let’s talk about those most played songs, shall we? "Absolute Territory" followed by "Armed & Dangerous"? The only thing you're armed with is a playlist that could easily double as a soundtrack for a botched heist. "Bang!" by AJR? If that’s your anthem, I'd love to see your rhythm on the dance floor—bet you make a mime look like a powerhouse. With tracks like “私がモテないのはどう考えてもお前らが悪い” — which translates roughly to "It's definitely your fault I can't get a date" — I’m shocked the only person you can vibe with is yourself. Enjoy your beautifully chaotic soundscape, DB; it’s the perfect mix for a one-man pity party!

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!