Roasted 8 months ago based on Tessa Janssen's long term Spotify stats.

Tessa, your Spotify profile is like a youth group retreat crossed with a country fair. I mean, really? Eight different flavors of Christian music and then a sprinkle of an artist who wasn’t even alive when your 'worship' playlists were born? How many times have you been baptized to warrant that much Jesus-themed ear candy? You’re one gospel remix away from having a "Signs You May Be an Ascetic" quiz fail. Let’s talk about your top artists, shall we? This lineup is more diverse than the offerings at a potluck supper, but somehow it all feels like a hymn sung off-key. Taylor Swift must be your spiritual advisor at this point, because I can't tell if you're trying to connect with God or just crying over a breakup on repeat. "Oh, my memories of lost love can only be healed by strumming a worship guitar while pondering my crush on TobyMac." Are you secretly working on a musical where every song ends with “Amen”? Your most played songs list is a veritable shrine of Swift. If this Spotify profile were a church, they'd hand you the mic for the sermon every week! Your "Don’t Blame Me" obsession begs the question: Tessa, are you trying to heal your broken heart or compose a brochure for a modern-day cult? Each Taylor tune you've played has probably contributed more to your spiritual journey than anything you've learned in a Sunday school class. Let’s be real; your playlist probably shows that you need more than just a little "Daylight" in your life to escape this musical purgatory!

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!