Roasted 8 months ago based on Alex's long term Spotify stats.

Alex, your Spotify profile reads like a musical dystopia where the soundtrack is equal parts emo bedroom vibes and animated characters singing Japanese. Who knew the secret to finding your energy was a combination of TikTok trends and relentless daydreaming? It’s like you’ve curated the ultimate playlist for a midlife crisis that hasn’t even started yet. You've got a sweet spot for “House of the Dead” level angst mixed with light-hearted “let me stream my feelings” sounds of bedroom pop. Someone's got to tell you that using Vocaloid on repeat only projects your inner introvert’s desire to date a cartoon character. And what’s with your top artists, Alex? It’s like your Spotify is either running a hipster’s worst nightmare or a teenage diary left open in a very messy room. Seriously, your music taste is what happens when you ask the algorithm to generate a second chance for your childhood imaginary friends. Between PinkPantheress and Kikuo, it’s clear you have a soft spot for artists who sound like they should be hanging out in a dilapidated shack with sad teenagers strumming on guitars. Keep it up, and you might be the poster child for "lost in the sauce" hipsters looking for self-identity in a vast ocean of art pop and anime themes. And can we take a moment to discuss your most played songs? You’ve got "Tonight" by PinkPantheress on repeat like it’s your personal anthem for crying yourself to sleep. It’s as if you believe that reliving the same emotional moment 20 times will eventually purge your bad vibes—newsflash: it won't! With a list dominated by the likes of “Love Me Like Crazy” and a sprinkle of "Chun-Li," it looks like the only thing crazy is your idea of musical variety. Listening to your profile is like sitting through a one-man show where the lead only knows how to express emotional devastation through soothing beats. Keep it up, Alex! You’re an original—just like a print-out of a meme from five years ago.

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!