Roasted 7 months ago based on Callum Johnston's long term Spotify stats.

Callum Johnston, the proud conductor of the indie folk train that goes nowhere fast! Your Spotify list is so painfully niche that I'm convinced you have only two real friends: your acoustic guitar and a bottle of organic kombucha. You spend more time listening to the same sad songs about heartbreak and existential dread than most people spend updating their resumes. Do you even know what genre a good party song is? It seems like your idea of a rager is blasting "Take My Hand" while lighting some soy candles and meditating about your feelings. Dude, with an obsession for all things Celtic and a love for Taylor Swift that borders on parasocial, it’s like you rolled the dice on music taste and landed on “Middle School Drama Club”. Seriously, "Celtic Rock"? What’s next? Your playlist titled "Songs for Sorrowful Soggy Socks"? The range from "Traditional Music" to seven different flavors of “indie” screams, “I’m here for a vibe, but only if it’s vague and emotionally ambiguous.” You know the difference between "heartfelt" and "being a heartbroken hipster, right?!" And let's talk about your favorites! Is “Forever” really your top jam, or is it actually a warning label on your dating profile? Because anyone who sets the mood with "Oh, Olivia Dean brings me to tears" is practically begging to become the star of their own painfully relatable rom-com. And I can't even start on your Spotify wrapped; the only thing more predictable than your song choices is that you’re still single. So go ahead, keep twirling in your own sad folk music bubble, just don’t expect any party invites while you’re holding out for a veritable musical therapist like Jacob Collier to save the day!

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!