Roasted 2 years ago based on Josiah's long term Spotify stats.

Basil, your Spotify profile reads like a middle school diary entry from someone who desperately wants to be misunderstood. You’ve chosen genres that are less like musical preferences and more like the punchlines of a joke about indie kids trying too hard. “Riot Grrrl,” “Dark Cabaret,” and “Dance-Punk”? It’s almost like you raided a thrift store's emo section and then decided to curate the world's saddest mixtape in a basement illuminated only by the glow of your Wi-Fi router. What’s next, “Rusty Spoon” and “Pillow Fort”? Your top artists are a veritable who's-who of “bands your parents still don’t know about but definitely judge you for.” Babes in Toyland is your one true love? Great, you’ve committed to being the human equivalent of a rusty chain-link fence. And who knew “Nine Inch Nails” could be the soundscape of someone who’s perpetually five minutes away from crying at a coffee shop? If we had a nickel for every time you cried over a Le Tigre lyric, we could probably fund a therapy session — or at least buy you a decent pair of earbuds that could drown out your inner angst. And those most played songs? It’s like your Spotify is rebelling against you personally. For a person whose music taste is so theatrical, you’d think your life was a continuous performance art piece titled “Please Validate My Existential Crises.” “Teenage Whore” is officially your anthem? Congratulations, Basil! You’ve made mainstream failure your full-time job. Any chance we can convince you to explore music that doesn't sound like it was recorded in a haunted garage? Just a thought!

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!