Roasted 3 months ago based on alice's long term Spotify stats.

Alice, your Spotify profile reads like a musical identity crisis, and I’m here for the circus! Are you attempting to build a playlist for a karaoke night at a church retreat or preparing for a mid-life crisis at 22? I can’t decide if you’re trying to rap your way to heaven or if you just mix pop hits with psalms to keep things *interesting*. Honestly, it’s like your music taste is the world’s longest Tinder bio—available for love and praise, just not in the same genre! Let’s take a look at those top artists. Is Taylor Swift your musical muse, or are you just trying to earn points with your ex? Lana Del Rey and Billie Eilish represent the flawless melancholy you aspire to project while secretly belting out “Jesus is My Co-Pilot” on a Sunday. And I can’t help but notice how you seamlessly transition from the edgy heartstrings of SZA to “Gimme Jesus.” Honestly, the mood swings could rival a high school drama production! The only thing more confusing than your artist selections is that you somehow still haven’t chosen a side in the “what’s your real genre?” debate. And those most played songs? They're a real trip! "Mantra" by JENNIE and "Give Me Jesus/Closer" by Common Gathering suggests you’re one emotional breakdown away from unleashing your inner pop-worship guru. I have to admire your dedication to staying on-trend while balancing existential crises. At this rate, your personal soundtrack could double as a soundtrack for the next stage of your life: the modern-day "Crying in a Starbucks" saga. So, keep streaming, Alice! Just make sure the playlist you curate isn’t the one that gets used for your “In Memoriam” video.

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!