Roasted 2 years ago based on jordan.malewicz's long term Spotify stats.

Oh, Jordan Malewicz, what a Spotify profile you’ve got. Your music taste looks like a middle schooler's “deep” phase, scribbled on a bathroom stall. Seriously, is there a national shortage of creativity in music, or are you just hoarding every moldy fruitcake of a genre that nobody wants? I mean, who knew one person could love both “Post-Grunge” and “Melodic Rap” like they’re about to be forced to choose between their two kids? It’s like you’re trying to win an award for the most incongruent playlist ever – congrats, you’ve succeeded! Let’s talk about your top artists: "$uicideboy$." I get it; that's you trying to win the title of “Most Emotionally Conflicted Soundtrack.” It’s like you heard they’re coming out with a new song, and you decided, “Yes, I need to squeeze every drop of angst from my teenage years without ever actually growing up.” Saying you listen to them is like admitting you put ketchup on your sushi – it’s not just wrong; it’s an affront to common decency. And the fact that half of your “Most Played Songs” list comes straight from their catalog is like watching someone drown in a kiddie pool and cheering them on. And let’s give a shoutout to that eclectic but confusing mix of genres. You've got everything from Pop Punk to Alternative Metal, which seems less like a curated taste and more like a child smashing the keyboard and hoping for a Spotify miracle. The only thing your playlist is missing is a final touch of a midlife crisis anthem, but who knows? Maybe you just haven’t turned 30 yet. Here’s hoping that between all this angst, you find a way to update your profile from “sad on repeat” to “slightly less sad and possibly a functioning adult.” Good luck with that!

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!