Roasted 2 years ago based on rachel's long term Spotify stats.

Oh Rachel, your Spotify profile reads like the poster child for indecisiveness — a playlist mix that’s confused about whether it’s aiming for pretentious hipster or desperately trying to fit in with mainstream pop culture. I didn’t know "Permanent Wave" was a musical genre until I saw it on your list. Are we listening to music or just waiting for your emotional tide to come in? With all that bedroom pop, it’s a wonder you don’t have a day job composing sad songs in your parents' basement while you decide whether to sell your soul to TikTok trending challenges. Your top artists scream "manic pixie dream girl" with an identity crisis; one minute you’re vibing to Mitski’s existential dread, and the next you’re dancing to Eminem's pent-up rage like you're preparing for an awkward family reunion. The mix of Frank Ocean and Tyler, The Creator in your top five makes me think you just Google-searched “cool” and picked the first names that popped up. And let’s not even talk about claiming both Kanye West and Olivia Rodrigo as favorites—what are you trying to do? Start a musical civil war in your headphones? And then there are your most played songs. “Pyramids” followed by “Swalla?” It honestly sounds like your playlist is having an identity crisis of its own. One moment you're musing over life in neon-lit nostalgia with TV Girl, and the next you’re getting down to Jason Derulo. Channeling both edgy and basic energy in one sitting? Bravo, Rachel, who knew you could be such a musical chameleon? Just remember, when you inevitably have a breakdown fueled by your Spotify choices, I’ll be eavesdropping from the shadows, ready to roast you for your existential crises one playlist at a time.

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!