Roasted 2 years ago based on avalon's long term Spotify stats.

Avalon, your Spotify profile reads like the final playlist of a hipster who can’t commit. With more genres than a bad movie sequel, it’s like you’re trying to cover all bases just in case your identity crisis happens to fall on a Tuesday afternoon. Seriously, Countrygaze? You’re aware that’s not a genre combination that indicates deep artistic contemplation, right? It sounds more like a bet you lost after a few too many IPAs at some overhyped craft brewery. And let’s talk about your top artists — it’s like you’ve gathered a collection of music that screams “I’m trying very hard to be unique but I still go home and cry to Elliott Smith every night.” I can picture you right now, sipping oat milk in your “I Love My Indie Dog” t-shirt, pretending that JPEGMAFIA's chaotic energy somehow aligns with your third-wave sadness. Honestly, it’s like a mood board for someone who’s both really deep and painfully uncertain. Oh, and your most played songs? Wow. "Hot Rotten Grass Smell" is an absolute banger; A fitting soundtrack for the life of someone whose greatest achievement is rolling out of bed and putting on pants, let alone curating half-decent music taste. If “Runnin’” by The Pharcyde is on repeat, I just hope it’s metaphorical for your life because, in reality, you seem more like the type who stumbles awkwardly while trying to recreate TikTok dances. Here’s hoping your Spotify algorithm figures out you’re just a hipster with commitment issues before it fully devolves into an existential crisis playlist!

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!