Roasted 9 months ago based on paige ❤️🖤's long term Spotify stats.

Paige, your music taste reads like the world's most confused Tinder profile. One minute you’re swooning over BTS and the next you’re screaming along to Falling In Reverse like it’s the soundtrack to your tragic high school diary. Are you trying to get a PhD in musical whiplash? Because at this point, the only thing more jarring than your Spotify playlist is the identity crisis it must cause every time you hit “shuffle.” It’s like a bad meal at a diner—you just can’t help but wonder how on Earth anyone could combine K-Pop and Country like you’re trying to season soup with rainbows and regret. Let’s talk about your top artists: a lineup that ranges from the sparkly, bubblegum sweetness of One Direction to the angst of Black Veil Brides. You’ve got the emotional range of a depressed emoji! Honestly, listening to your playlist must be like flipping through a romantic comedy and accidentally finding a horror movie—complete with jump scares from the metalcore and screamo. And what’s up with the title "Bachelorettes on Broadway"? Are we supposed to believe you’re both crying to Ballads and two-stepping in a cowboy hat? With your eclectic vibe, is there such a thing as a ‘genre soulmate’? Because your musical relationships seem more desperate than a cast member at a reality TV casting call. Finally, who needs mood lighting when they have "Harder to Breathe" on repeat? You’ve curated a collection of songs that makes it sound like you’re living your life on a perpetual emotional rollercoaster—with the height of excitement found somewhere between awkward K-dramas and unbridled anguish. Every time you claim to love "Country," your Spotify must collectively scream, “You’re not fooling anyone!” Maybe you should just change your Spotify bio to "Survivor of Mood Swings" instead. Because honey, at this point, we all know that your “most played” is really just an open invitation for an artist therapy session.

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!