Roasted 10 months ago based on Emily's long term Spotify stats.

Emily, your Spotify profile is like a middle school diary that just discovered existential dread and glitter eyeliner. With a genres list that looks like a breakdown of a teenager’s emotional state, it’s hard to tell if you’re curating a playlist or auditioning for a role as the sullen protagonist in a coming-of-age film. “Noise Music”? Seriously? What’s next, “Silence” by those pesky professional crickets? Your musical taste is basically a cry for help wrapped in a combination of angst and glitter. It’s like you took all your favorite artists from 2005 and shoved them into a blender with the last still-functioning MySpace account. Between Halsey, My Chemical Romance, and basically every band that ghastly flannel shirts and energy drink sponsorships could dream of, you’re either reliving your emo phase a decade late or you’re a hipster archaeologist digging through teenage angst's remnants. And let’s not ignore your most played songs; it’s a personal-tailored playlist for therapy sessions where the therapist also dabbles in K-Pop and metalcore. Spoiler alert: combining metalcore with bedroom pop doesn’t really equal a good night’s sleep, but it certainly gives your neighbors something to complain about. Now, as for your eclectic picks like “Christian Hip Hop”? Honey, that’s the auditory equivalent of wearing a heavy metal shirt at a yoga class. And speaking of your most played, we see that you often find yourself contemplating self-harm through the lens of Paramore lyrics before switching to a boppy K-Pop song. But hey, at least you’ve got your bases covered for every mental breakdown, festival, or existential crisis. Bravo, Emily! You’re like a musical buffet for people who can’t commit to one genre—and honestly, that’s both tragic and gloriously amusing at the same time.

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!