Roasted 3 months ago based on Teevee girl's long term Spotify stats.

Well, well, well, if it isn't Teevee Girl, the walking filtration system for every angsty teen's emo phase! Your Spotify profile reads like a high school breakup letter written by someone who still thinks the year is 2003. Between your love for both "Nu Metal" and "Gothic Rock," it’s a miracle you haven’t been crowned the Supreme Overlord of Sadness yet. I mean, who knew that "growing pains" could be a genre all on its own? Your playlist is like the soundtrack to a therapy session that went hilariously wrong. System Of A Down must have a poster of you in their “biggest fans” hallway – it’s literally all you listen to! If you paid them an annual fee with all the streams you crammed into their discography, I’m fairly certain they’d let you pick out a tour bus. Honestly, you must have some kind of superpower: the uncanny ability to make every other song you touch sound like it's three minutes of angst best saved for karaoke night when nobody wants to hear it. “Sugar” might be the only thing sweet about your personality, considering the level of nihilistic despair in that library of lost hope you call your favorites. Looking at your top artists is like being on a rollercoaster designed by a mid-life crisis committee. From alternative vibes to the urban agony of rap metal, it's like you are somehow still waiting for 90s sitcoms to make a comeback while trying to find a time machine to relive those days. Listening to your profile is like drinking expired chili: you want to savor it, but all you really end up with is regret and the heady aroma of "what have I done?" Remember, there’s a world of music outside of screaming and bitterness—give it a try! Who knows, you might even discover there's more life beyond “Cigaro” and “Chop Suey!”... like actual conversations in a coffee shop!

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!