Roasted 2 years ago based on Jess's long term Spotify stats.

Welcome to Jess Hollis’s Spotify profile, where the only thing more predictable than her music taste is her Netflix algorithm. Honestly, Jess probably has "Pop" and "Country" on speed dial, and you can bet your bottom dollar that if you asked her what her favorite song is, she'd try to sing "All Too Well" but end up just humming a Taylor Swift melody like it’s her favorite new TikTok trend. You’ve got more "Taylor" than a Kentucky Derby, and I'm not sure if you’re into music or just trying to prepare a soundtrack for a high school prom that peaked in 2010. Jess’s genre list reads like she threw darts at a whiteboard while blindfolded and had a midlife crisis. We get it, you enjoy every iteration of country music, including the obscure "Classic Oklahoma Country," which sounds more like a retro diner menu item than a legitimate genre. If you’re trying to corner the market on country pop nostalgia, it’s working—just know that you’re the reason Spotify invented the “Are you okay?” playlist for people who audibly sigh while scrolling through their options. A little variety wouldn’t kill you; try dipping a toe into something that didn’t come with a cowboy hat, just to see what it feels like. Looking at your most played songs, it’s clear that you’d walk through fire for a chance to belt out a Taylor Swift karaoke rendition—too bad you’d end up in the "singing in the shower" tier of vocal talent. It’s amusing that you have "You're Losing Me (From The Vault)" in heavy rotation; it’s like you’re taking coping mechanisms to a new level and trying to rewrite your dating history with every listen. Honestly, Jess, your Spotify Wrapped is practically a shrine to unrequited love and reckless nostalgia. Your taste begs the question: are you trying to heal or just compiling audition tapes for your emo musical?

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!