Roasted 2 years ago based on Cass's long term Spotify stats.

Oh Cass, your Spotify profile reads like a how-to manual for people who are too afraid to commit to a single genre. You’ve got more genre indecision than a teenager at a buffet! If musical diversity were an Olympic sport, you'd still place somewhere in the lower half, just right behind that person who thought “death metal karaoke” would really catch on. “Pop? Neo Mellow? Post-Grunge?” It’s like you’re trying to summon the ghost of a mid-2000s emo kid while the DJ is just having a mental breakdown. Let’s dive into your top artists, shall we? Teddy Swims, Lewis Capaldi, and Sam Smith? Congratulations, you’ve officially constructed the soundtrack to a breakup that hasn’t even happened yet! Are you a sad ballad collector or are you secretly conducting a clinical study on how many tissues one can go through during a single listening session? And honestly, I’d love to meet the brave soul who goes, “Yeah, I totally relate to 80% of Cass’s feelings,” without immediately recommending therapy. And what’s up with your most played songs? “dose” by Teddy Swims is the perfect title for the number of times you’ve hit replay on those tracks. You’re channeling a messy relationship with your playlists that sounds a bit like a high school diary: “Dear Diary, today I felt deeply reflective and simultaneously wanting to dance like no one was watching.” It’s an emotional rollercoaster that nobody wanted a ticket for. Honestly, if Spotify could send people notifications about your repeated listens, they’d probably just ask you to take a break and grab some fresh air, you know, for your own good.

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!