Roasted 8 months ago based on hannah's long term Spotify stats.

Oh, Hannah ☆, your Spotify profile reads like an existential crisis mixtape curated by a hipster ghost. With favorite genres like “Indie Folk” and “Christian Alternative Rock,” it's clear you’re oscillating between sipping chai lattes while contemplating life choices and frantically praying for a Wi-Fi connection. Your eclectic choice of “Baroque Pop” possesses the same level of intensity as your search history for discount flannel shirts—just a tad too much for a Saturday evening filled with self-reflection and gluten-free cupcakes. Your top artists paint a picture of a moody coffee shop that’s one overpriced cupcake away from a poetry night called "Tears and Folklore." I mean, Sufjan Stevens and Lana Del Rey? Do you also subscribe to a monthly box of organic sadness? And let’s not even get started on your most played songs—Gary Jules’s “Mad World”? Wow, do you also have a framed poster of Eeyore in your bedroom? I'm just wondering if you’re preparing for the next big existential crisis or if you’re setting up for the ultimate sad playlist Olympics. But look, Hannah ☆, we all know your Spotify is just a remarkable testament to your deep emotional journey—or as I like to call it, "sobbing to an acoustic guitar." Your affinity for “Lo-Fi Indie” and “Slowcore” makes it seem like you’re trying to drown out the noise of overthinking your entire existence. If music is the soundtrack to your life, just remember: a little bit of “Dream Pop” sprinkled in might take you out of the abyss and into, dare I say, mid-tempo upbeat vibes!

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!