Roasted 1 month ago based on Riku's long term Spotify stats.

Riku, your Spotify profile reads like the emotional diary of a hipster who couldn't decide between an existential crisis and a daytime nap. Who knew you could mix the vibes of Shibuya-Kei with the weight of Dark R&B, and somehow end up sounding like a playlist only your cat would appreciate? With genres like "Bedroom Pop" and "Dream Pop," it’s clear you have a favorite place, and it's anywhere where you can introspectively stare at the ceiling—while crying, of course. You’ve constructed a sonic landscape where even the ghosts of grunge past roll their eyes and mutter, “This kid just doesn’t get it.” Your top artists are a buffet of sounds that say: "I promise I'm deep!" but the only thing deeper are your questionable choices in music. Chase Atlantic? Really? How many times are you planning to sulk about just being a 'friend'? Listening to Taylor Swift isn't going to magically give you the romantic prowess of a pop star; it’s just going to remind you of your perpetual single status while you replay her greatest hits on repeat like a middle schooler who just discovered heartbreak. And don’t even get me started on Sabrina Carpenter—does your Spotify account come with a side of teenage angst or is the struggle to adult just too real for you? Your most played songs are a cry for help, or maybe just a need for a personal life coach. "Friends," "Slow Down," and "Meddle About" are leading the charge of your playlist, screaming, "I don't know what I want!" all while you're binge-watching sad TikToks in your room. At least with titles like "Sex, Drugs, Etc.," we finally find a song that represents all your questionable life choices. So here’s a suggestion: step away from your monochrome posters and take a risk—try listening to something outside your moody bubble, or at least consider updating your Spotify bio to “Just a long-term commitment to awkward situations.”

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!