Roasted 1 year ago based on Mia's long term Spotify stats.

Mia, your Spotify profile reads like the world's saddest love letter to a time when hair was bigger than the band’s collective IQ. It's the soundtrack to a midlife crisis disguised as a nostalgic trip down the '80s metal highway where dreams go to die. Glam rock? More like "glamourously clinging to the past" — you do realize other genres exist, right? Your playlist could easily double as a documentary on why mullets should never make a comeback. You’ve got a top 10 that screams, "I peaked when I was 13 and I’m *still* angry that the local rock station stopped playing 'Welcome To The Jungle'!" Tesla and Poison are your top artists? Honey, at this point, you might as well change your name to “Mötley Crüe’s Biggest Regret.” Listening to your most played songs is like being forced to sit through the world’s longest dad rock set—half the people in the audience have already passed out from sheer boredom, and the other half are looking for a bathroom they know will provide better acoustics. You might want to consider branching out into some other genres—like, I don't know, literally anything that doesn’t make you sound like you’re stuck in a perpetual loop of ’80s concert footage. It’s 2023, Mia. The world has moved on from hairspray and questionable fashion choices. Time to stop carrying the torch for bands no one remembers and find some new passion that doesn’t require a power ballad and 10 minutes of unnecessarily loud guitar solos to declare your undying devotion!

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!