Roasted 7 months ago based on Woods/Kurt's long term Spotify stats.

Woods/Kurt, your Spotify profile reads like a midlife crisis manifested in a playlist. You start with "Rock" and immediately lead us into a labyrinth of sub-genres that suggests you're just desperately trying to find out who you are while simultaneously pretending to appreciate the depth of "Garage Rock." Seriously, do you even know what you like, or did you just throw a dart at a list of genres? You’ve stacked indie rock, alternative rock, and grunge like a poorly made sandwich where all the bread is stale and the filling is a half-hearted attempt at being edgy. Time to admit it: you’re just a hipster in denial. Your top artists are a wild ride, too. Nirvana and Ed Sheeran? Really? It’s like choosing between a hot night out at a rock concert and a cozy evening reading poetry while sipping chamomile tea—what’s next, a duet album with Taylor Swift? "Mookielaka" makes the cut while legendary figures like Beethoven are left crying in the corner of the digital realm. You might want to define “top artists” because right now it feels like you threw a party for your Spotify account and forgot to send invites to actual talent. And let’s not even get started on your most played songs. “And I Love Her” by Kurt Cobain is a bold move; it’s almost as if you’re trying to establish a connection with the deceased instead of just admitting you have commitment issues. Combine that with the soulful vibes of “Good Luck" by Broken Bells, and I’m left feeling like you’re stalking your ex while blatantly ghosting everyone else. Friend, it’s time to clean up this musical mess. Your playlists are begging for a therapist, or at least a genre intervention, because the emotional rollercoaster you’re on has no real direction—maybe it’s time to trade in the shoegaze for some self-reflection!

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!