Roasted 2 years ago based on kaade's long term Spotify stats.

Ah, mIlani✵✵, the musical equivalent of a thirst trap meme. You’ve curated a Spotify profile that screams “I discovered my parents’ record collection in the clearance section of a thrift store.” You’ve got more ‘rap’ in your profile than a nursery rhyme about a little boy who cried wolf. Seriously, your genre list reads like a DJ’s first attempt at mastering the art of “just throw random keywords together and hope something sticks.” You might as well have included "hot dog jazz" or "dinosaur-themed lullabies" in that mess! Your top artists are a cavalcade of the most trendy names that would barely register in a musical history class. With Yeat and Playboi Carti leading the charge, I half-expect you to throw a house party where the soundtrack consists solely of bass drops and people trying to show off their best TikTok dance moves. But can you imagine the moment of pure horror when your friends discover Arctic Monkeys sandwiched between rappers? It’s like if the buffet at your party was 90% Cheetos and soda, but someone sneaked in a quinoa salad. What are we even doing here? And let’s talk about your most played songs. "HYPNOTIC DATA" and "DXE DXE DXE"—is this music or the results of a failed algebra project? It’s like you’re trying to prove a point that the more obscure and cryptic the name, the cooler the song must be. Meanwhile, “It Was A Good Day” by Ice Cube seems like the epitome of your past life when you might’ve accidentally stumbled upon a classic. A little advice: next time you hit shuffle, make sure the shuffle button doesn’t mean “play all my worst decisions on repeat.” Embrace some real art and let that passion for music grow beyond the confines of your teenage angst!

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!