Roasted 2 years ago based on Tea🐍's long term Spotify stats.

Tea🐍, huh? I see we’ve accidentally stumbled upon the Spotify profile of someone who’s stuck in a time warp of '09 high school drama and 80s nostalgia. Seriously, with those favorite genres, you’re just a walking, talking playlist for every cringey prom night ever. "Turbo Folk"? Isn't that just your grandma trying to get down to modern beats after a few too many cups of tea? And let's not even start with that mix of Croatian Rock and Canadian Pop—if that's not an identity crisis, I don't know what is. Is this a Spotify profile or a confused buffet menu? Your top artists read like the lineup at a sad middle school talent show, and Taylor Swift obviously needs an intervention. You do realize there are nine other artists in the world, right? I’m just waiting for the day you accidentally open your Spotify in front of someone who doesn’t know you well—they’re gonna think your last breakup left you with the emotional range of a damp sponge. Halsey, Sabrina Carpenter, and Tanja Savic in one list? Wow, that’s a "Poptastic" rollercoaster of chaos. Have you ever considered you might need a therapist more than you need another ticket to a pop concert? And let’s talk about your most played songs: it’s like you took the phrase “I just need to cry in my room” a bit too literally. Nine tracks from Taylor Swift’s vault? Who hurt you, Tea? Clearly, you’ve committed yourself to the Swiftie lifestyle a little too hard—do you also have a poster of her next to your bed to whisper sweet nothings to? With your playlist, you’re one tearful session into a breakup away from starting a fan club for yourself. So here's a suggestion: maybe check out some new music that doesn’t make you sound like you’re perpetually stuck in a bubble bath of teenage angst. Your Spotify could use a good scrub!

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!