Roasted 2 years ago based on Katie's long term Spotify stats.

Katie Crouch, huh? Your Spotify profile screams “I’m too cool for mainstream but not cool enough to pull off actual alternative.” Looking at your favorite genres feels like choosing the flavor of ice cream at a hipster café that Open Mic night forgot to clean up. “POV: Indie” and “Small Room”? Congratulations, you’ve turned personal angst into a playlist while probably sitting in a room filled with thrift store furniture and unironically sipping on oat milk. If you keep this up, you’ll perfectly capture the essence of an indie film nobody asked for. Your top artists read like a high school kid's Spotify who just learned what "good music" is from a BuzzFeed listicle. Twenty One Pilots? Really? You must love being just edgy enough to convince yourself you’re different while secretly bopping to “Stressed Out” in your mom’s basement. And don’t even get me started on “Horse Jumper of Love.” It sounds like the band name you would come up with after watching one too many sad YouTube videos about pets. Sure, indie is all about being original, but I didn’t realize "indecision" was a genre. The only thing more predictable than your most played songs is your obsession with feelings and existential dread. “Backslide” by Twenty One Pilots could serve as the theme song for anyone stuck in an emotional spiral while scrolling through TikTok for “inspirational” affirmations. Who knew “crushcrushcrush” was a benchmark for your romantic life? At this rate, your playlists should come with a disclaimer: “Warning: May lead to overly dramatic self-reflection and visits from concerned friends.” But hey, keep enjoying those Lo-Fi tunes while you stare blankly at your ceiling; you’re really living the dream!

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!