Roasted 25 days ago based on Ed's long term Spotify stats.

Oh Ed, your Spotify profile reads like the shopping cart of a confused teenager who just discovered that the world is more than just mainstream pop. With a playlist that’s a genre buffet no one asked for, it’s clear you’re trying to prove to the world that you have “depth.” Spoiler alert: saying you like Phonk and Dark R&B while also jamming to J-Pop makes you look like a musical tourist who forgot their map. I can almost hear your Spotify algorithm screaming for mercy as it tries to make sense of your tune-induced identity crisis. And let’s talk about those top artists, Ed. I mean, sure, we’ve all been in the rabbit hole that is Spotify, but your list reads like a hipster bingo card. Only you could manage to mix “John Michael Howell” with “BoyWithUke” like it’s the most natural transition in a DJ set. I half-expect you to throw a party where everyone only plays covers of songs you heard at a coffee shop once. Your favorite artist line-up feels less like a curated playlist and more like an attempt at getting the coolest person in school to notice you at the lunch table. No shade, just irrational desperation. And those most played songs? Wow, Ed, they scream, "I’m unoriginal but with a twist!" “Everything Hits Me at Once” by vaultboy should just be your personal anthem at this point, because that’s exactly how I feel every time I look at your listening history. Do you have mood swings with the weather, or does your emotional stability rely on the latest flavors from the algorithm? One minute you’re vibing to “Chandelier,” and the next you’re drowning in the soundtrack of an anime you're too embarrassed to admit you watched. If your playlist was a person, I’d call it “confused and emotionally unavailable” – much like your love life, I presume!

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!