Roasted 10 months ago based on von's long term Spotify stats.

Oh, von, your Spotify profile is like a glittery piñata filled with disappointment — every genre you list is a different shade of beige, and if “faux depth” were a genre, it would be number eleven on your list. I mean, pop, R&B, and hyperpop? Are you trying to confuse the Siri in your phone about your personality? Your music taste reads like a middle schooler's diary: half-heartedly trendy and desperately trying to be relatable. Just admit it, you’re one tantrum away from becoming the poster child for pop culture's ‘I just don’t fit in’ era. Your obsession with Tate McRae is borderline concerning, like you think she’ll write a song about your sad excuses for a love life. You’ve got more plays of her songs than you’ve gotten actual dates this year. Seriously, is this music playlist or therapy session? At this rate, the next time you break up with a significant other, we all know who the real winner is gonna be: Tate McRae. It's hilarious that you keep playing her tracks; you’re treating your pain like Spotify is a jukebox at the saddest diner in town. And let’s not ignore those "most played songs" — each one sounds like it was crafted in an emotional blender. With titles like "hurt my feelings" and "cut my hair," I’d say your Spotify is less of a playlist and more of a public service announcement for those in heartbreak recovery. Listening to you talk about these tracks is like watching a high school talent show — awkward, filled with cringey emotion, and ultimately, not even the parents want to clap. Just know that your Spotify Wrapped might need to come with a therapist’s number this year; you're not just playing tracks, you're harvesting trauma.

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!