Roasted 8 months ago based on Mert's long term Spotify stats.

Mert, your Spotify profile reads like a hipster's manifesto after one too many overpriced oat milk lattes. I mean, did you just Google “most trendy genres” and pick the first ten that sounded cool? With a list that screams "I need to impress someone at a vegan brunch," it's no surprise you have more genres than you have friends. Are you trying to cover all the bases in case you accidentally stumble into a music debate? Newsflash: nobody’s debating the merits of Jazz Rap in 2023, my dude! Your top artists are basically the "Who's Who" of ego-driven geniuses who might just drop out of a music festival halfway through their set because they're too busy contemplating the universe. Congratulations on having enough Drake and Kanye to fill an ex’s therapy session with narcissism! And Playboi Carti? If he had a dollar for every time you played "OLYMPIAN," he could fund a new era of music—one that hopefully doesn't include you. Seriously, if I were to hear "squabble up" one more time, I might have to petition to have your Spotify privileges revoked. But let's not ignore your most played songs. It's like a playlist for the emotionally confused and perpetually misunderstood. “more chaos” by Ken Carson? I see you really living up to the title! The only thing more chaotic than your taste in music is your playlist’s mood swings, which make a teenager’s diary look stable. So, here’s a suggestion: maybe mix in some new tracks with a little less angst—and by that, I mean anything that doesn't sound like it was produced in an underground bunker. Your ears (and friends) will thank you!

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!