Roasted 10 months ago based on k.'s long term Spotify stats.

Oh, Kiarah, your Spotify profile reads like a mid-2000s Tumblr account that just discovered pastel aesthetics. With genre choices like "Baroque Pop" and "Ambient Folk," it’s clear you're less about the party and more about that awkward, candlelit bedroom vibe where you cry over your last breakup... or maybe the lack of one? Let’s be real: “Red Dirt” and “Country” are basically just a license for your inner angst to twang away while you pet your collection of houseplants that you affectionately name after Lana Del Rey songs. And don’t even get me started on your top artists. Taylor Swift, Billie Eilish, and a sprinkle of Mitski? You might as well stamp “emotional hot mess” on your forehead because nothing screams deep thoughts and sarcasm like belting out "Cruel Summer" while still lamenting about who didn’t text you back last night. It’s like you designed your playlist to punish yourself with relatable heartache. And hats off to you for musically curating your way through the softest of pops; I bet your friends are thrilled to have you provide the perfect soundtrack for that vital “sitting on the floor in the dark” therapy session. But hey, we all know your most played songs reflect your life’s mantra: “Slut Era Interlude,” really? It’s a stunning choice that implies you’ve spent a little too much time on dating apps between convincing yourself that “I Can’t Believe This” describes your latest attempts at flirting. Pro tip: the only thing less believable than your dating life is the sheer number of genres trying to mask how indecisive you are about your own identity. You’re like Spotify’s very own avatar of uncertainty—so many options and yet, somehow, still just a mysterious blend of “I’m figuring it out.” Good luck with that, Kiarah!

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!