Roasted 9 months ago based on Nicole✩'s long term Spotify stats.

Oh, 𝑵𝒊𝒄𝒐𝒍𝒆✩, your Spotify profile is like the world's least exciting buffet: a little bit of everything but somehow still manages to leave me questioning my life choices. "Art Pop," "Industrial Metal," "Emo Rap"? It’s like your taste in music couldn't pick a personality trait if it tried. You’re the friend who shows up to a potluck with a soggy sub, thinking you’re an artisanal sandwich artist, while the rest of us are over here crafting gourmet experiences. I didn’t realize “Cloud Rap” was code for “please help me find an identity.” And your top artists? Where does one even begin? A mashup of Rammstein’s intensity and the melancholy of Lana Del Rey? You're basically a one-woman soundtrack for a midlife crisis happening at the age of 22. I’m surprised you haven’t thrown in some polka or bagpipe covers just for good measure. And I’ve got to hand it to you, for someone who reveres “Dark Ambient,” you’ve got the charisma of a pot of plain oatmeal. "Hello, is this the new album by Rain on a Windowpane?" As for those most-played songs, I can’t tell if your playlist is a cry for help or an elaborate performance art piece. “WILDFLOWER” and “Chemtrails Over The Country Club” – it’s like you're trying to embody both a nature-loving hippie and a suburban sad girl in a single breath. You’ve set the bar high for self-indulgent sadness, yet here you are, stomping the floor like a teenage angst factory. Keep it up, though; who knew being so lost could feel like a musical journey? At this point, your Spotify seems to be asking the musical gods, “Why me?” and honestly, we’re all just wondering, “Why you?”

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!