Roasted 2 years ago based on Herbertalert's long term Spotify stats.

Herbertalert? More like Herbert-almost-on-the-cool-side, but sadly, just a 'no' when it comes to having real taste in music. Seriously, your Spotify profile reads like a Nigerian party collided with a church service and forgot to bring any fun. I mean, how does one go from the lively bounce of Afrobeats and Ghanaian Hip Hop to being serenaded by Nathaniel Bassey? Were you trying to spice up your Sunday service playlist or are you just really committed to holding on to your grandma’s bias against "secular" music? Your top artists are basically a masterclass in identity crisis— it’s like you can't decide if you want to vibe with Fireboy or break into a prayer circle with Dunsin Oyekan. And let's not gloss over your top songs; you've got way too many “Live” tracks on there. What were you thinking? Were you under the impression that we’d be impressed with your “worship-worn” playlist versus something that actually evolves with modern music trends? We get it; you experience spiritual highs while the rest of us are out on the dance floor, shaking it to the next big hit. And can we talk about your love for “UK Pop” in the midst of African rhythms? It’s like you were hit by a cultural tornado, and all that survived was a hodgepodge of afrobeats and Sam Smith vibes. From worship to a British ballad in one playlist, it’s the musical equivalent of a bad Tinder date—uncomfortable, confused, and so not what we signed up for. Step it up, Herbertalert! You're either ready to party or ready to pray, but right now you look like you're waiting for the next Nigerian Jesus to drop a fire track.

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!