Roasted 2 months ago based on zion's long term Spotify stats.

Ah, Zion, the musical equivalent of someone wearing socks with sandals at a music festival. Your Spotify profile reads like the playlist of an emotional support animal who can’t decide whether it wants to soothe you or leave you haunted by obscure indie artists. Seriously, "Neo Soul" and "Alternative R&B"? What are you trying to do, make us forget that you live in your mom’s basement while quoting poetry no one wants to read? Your top artists showcase a curated selection that could either be genius or a cry for help—maybe both. Mixing Joni Mitchell with cupcakKe is ambitious, I'll give you that. It's like ordering a kale smoothie and then following it up with a double cheeseburger; there’s no consistency, and honestly, it’s just confusing. The only vibe you're giving off is “I deeply overanalyze everything, including the cereal I eat for breakfast.” I mean, even Björk would give you the side-eye with that lineup. And let’s talk about your most played songs—"Hey, Who Really Cares" is a mood, but honey, it’s also a reflection on your choices. "Cumshot" might be the only explicit indicator of your relationship history, and it’s sadder than your Yearbook quote. Azealia Banks off your top three? That's not a flex, that's an SOS. You’re just a few playlists away from being the TikTok trendsetter that everyone rolls their eyes at. But hey, keep trying, Zion! At least you’re making life a little more fun for the rest of us with your absurd musical explorations.

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!